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After a weekend of family time I was able to get away this evening for about an hour. After dinner I went walking at the park. Usually I’ll go with my mom or sister, but I went alone. Every now and then I just need to do that.
Well, walking alone this evening was great. I had my cell phone/radio with me, put in the ear pieces, tuned into Art Laboe and just walked til I couldn’t walk any more. While walking I got to look around and see everything. I saw kids running and playing in the grass. I saw more kids have the time of their life while sliding down the pirate ship playground set. I saw families having BBQ’s. Couples lounging around closely together. I saw bouncy balls land in the creek. Trees blowing in the breeze. The sun setting.
I just took it all in and found myself smiling and feeling really good. I guess I felt good because in everything I saw tonight, I was able to see myself in it. And I just felt alive. What a great way to end the weekend.
I just can’t. I’ve began writing about 4 or 5 different times. About 4 or 5 different topics, then deleted them all. Ugh, its just not happening.
I’m tired. I was pretty hungover this morning…Ok, I lied, I think I was still a wee bit drunk when I came in at 9:15! As soon as I got into work I started my period. Niiice. I’m cramping. I can’t concentrate today. I just want to lay my head on the desk and have someone wake me at 4:00 so I can go home.
I really wish I could just record the thoughts from my mind straight into my Blog. I had a good string of thoughts going yesterday that I wanted to write about today, but I must’ve drowned them out with all the Miller Lite I had last night. Blah.
I swear, twice today I was walking towards another person, said Hi there and they kept fucken walking without even acknowledging me. WTF? How RUDE!
Fucken snooty ass people. I guess I’m just going to walk with my nose in the air and a FUCK YOU look on my face from now on.
I’m so done with Summer. So done. I’ve never really been one who’s loved Summer. I think its because of all the years that I’ve been a Big girl. You know, Big girls usually don’t wear shorts, bathing suits or enjoy sweating. That’s me.
This year we got a late start on Summer, now I’m really over it. I do enjoy being able to have the doors and windows open ’til late hours of the night. I enjoy being able to sit outside, drink in hand, music playing and enjoying the evening with family and friends until almost Midnight. Sometimes past Midnight. But this humidity and sweating? This shit’s gotta fricken STOP! WTF happened?
Well, whatever, I’m so done with Summer. I’m really ready to begin looking for Halloween costumes for the girls. I enjoy Halloween. We take the kids’ to Emmy’s house, they bbq & we hang out. After dinner, we take the kids’ walking in Emmy’s neighborhood and then come back for a little while longer. Her family is so nice, too. Then after Halloween, you’ve got Thanksgiving! You know what that means right? CHRISTMAS SHOPPING the day after!!!! WOOHOO! Some might call me crazy, but I call myself FINISHED at the end of the day. Ironic, though, here I look forward to Christmas all year long and then I knock out all my shopping in one day. And then REFUSE to go to any mall until after the second week in January. What’s up with that?
I’m also ready to begin stocking up on firewood and busting out the log burner again! Ahhhh, there’s nothing like cool Autumn/Winter nights, fire pit in a full blaze, jackets and beanine on, drinking cold beer outside while listening to Art Laboe with Angel on Sunday nights. Now that is pure heaven. Yup, we definitely need to get the hell out of Summer.
Oh well, 61 days until Autumn arrives. But really, in CA, that doesn’t mean squat. On Halloween its still warm enough to be out in T-shirts and shorts sometimes. So our weather may cool down more towards Thanksgiving, if we’re lucky. If not, then we’ll be looking closer to NYE.
For several reasons really. This morning I was outside with Lucy at 5:30, it was quiet, cool & I could tell the sun was beginning to rise. So I walked down the driveway a bit to check it out. But couldn’t see it because of the stupid apartment complex that is in front of our house. I stood there, on my tippy toes, tried to look around the apartment complex but nothing. It made me a bit sad. It sucks that I had to make an effort to see a sun rise and still didn’t see it. I just walked back to the house.
In NM we could sit in the kitchen of our vacation rental and see the sun rise. I enjoyed sitting on the deck, in the morning, just soaking up not only the beauty but the stillness of it all. That was a pure slice of heaven. We’ve been camping many many times but I’ve never experienced anything as peaceful as those few days we spent in NM.
Same as the sun rising, we stood at our front door in NM to watch the sun set. I shared that beautiful moment with my daughter. At home, we’ve got apartment complexes on both sides of us. So the sun comes and goes with none of us ever seeing it. Next thing you know its dark. Period. I’m glad she and I had that moment to ourselves. That is what this picture is from. Looking out the front door, with my daughter, watching the sun set (for the first time in my 33 years of life) in Taos, NM on 4th of July. Pure heaven. Something I’ll never forget.
Another reason I’d love to be back in NM is Tito. He was so relaxed, funny, playful and just in an over all good mood. We hung out and did nothing. We napped when we wanted to. We could sit and just be together. I felt good. But now that we’re home, things are different. He’s back to the hustle and bustle of his sucky ass job. Which means long hours, changing schedules/products, stress, not enough sleep, not wanting to do anything, being moody and just a downer. *sigh*
We could really use more vacations to recharge, but its just not possible for him. Too bad, because he, most of all, could really use it.
I wish we were back in NM.
Just found out that Mister will be starting his night shift next month. Next month! In fricken AUGUST. WTF? First it was October. Last year they had him starting nights in September. Now August? {rolleyes}
What does that mean? It means him getting on a completely different schedule than the rest of us. It means him being awake at the most ungodly hours of the night while the rest of us sleep. It means him sleeping later. Ugh. It also means him being gone before I get home. It means dinner not always being made. It means the kids and I eating more Cup O’ Noodle soup than I care to think about. It means there goes our sex life! It means not really seeing/spending time together until the weekend. It means me being scared for the first 2 weeks til I get use to being alone.
But on the flip side, it means my house will stay cleaner, longer. It means quiet evenings. Or loud evenings without the guilt and concern of waking him! It means being able to go to the gym at 5:00 a.m. again! It means when he is home, making the most of our time together.
I really hate his job.
Geeze Louise! Either there was a full moon last night or I had the worst case of raging PMS ever known to woman! Cramping all day. Nausea. Back ache. And 96 degrees at 5:00 when I’m leaving work, I already wasn’t in any mood to deal with any shit tonight.
I had to drive into Long Beach to pick up my pictures .{WTF was I thinking having them delivered to LB??} Not only was it about 20 minutes past my house, but I was rocking out to Mary J. in my car that I completely passed the CVS and ended up in Signal Hill. Ugh. Finally I found the CVS got in and out in a couple of minutes. Cool.
When I get home, its still hot. BUT I’m not complaining! I’d rather have a 96 degree CA summer than a 50 degree CA rainy winter! Dinner’s not ready when I get home. Glad I wasn’t really hungry tonight.
Now let me talk about the kids. I could’ve sworn when I gave birth to them that they came with all necessary parts to function correctly. Apparently, their brains are removable and I’ve been unaware of this for the past 4-8 years. They’re standing outside, like a couple of Dummies, while my niece soaks them with the water hose. But I can hear them yelling STOP IT! They obviously know they didn’t want to get wet, or knew they’d get in trouble for it. But why, oh why, did they just stand there like a couple of bookends? Finally, my sister goes out and grabs her child {who is now SCREAMING like a mad banshee} and sticks her in the house.
My soaking wet kids now come to the door, dripping, shivering {how can you shiver when its 96 degrees outside???}, whining and asking me to get them a towel. A towel? Are you kidding me? You stood there like a Dummy and let a six year old wet you with a water hose, now I’m watching TV with Mister for the only 2.5 hours a night I get to see him M-F and you want ME to get up and get YOU a towel just because I’m your mother and you couldn’t remember, be bothered to move or run when your six year old cousin was wetting you with a water hose?!? Pah-leeze! Are you serious? You’ve lived in this house for 7 years, you know where the towels are, get them yourself!
Finally the wet, dripping, Dummies come in to change. Mom, what do we do with our wet clothes? {Blank look on my face} What do you ALWAYS do with your wet clothes? {shaking my head}
Now I can hear the arguing in their room. WHAT’S GOING ON???? I’ve got the little one running around nekkid because she can’t find any underwear. If you’d LOOK in your drawer, you’d see about FIVE + pair sitting right there! Ugh. Then C gets dressed in BRAND NEW clothes. Why? Where do you think you’re going? You’re NOT going outside to play like that. Change. What does she grab next? A fricken TURTLE NECK SWEATER! {Another blank look on my face} Its still 96 degrees outside kid! We’re NOT in NZ!
After pitching a massive attitude fit because she can’t wear what she wants to, I make her take the dog out. Why the fuck not? She’s already pissed at me! What do we hear next? Her outside YELLING at the dog to hurry up and pee! I had had it by this point. I’m about to loose it, seriously. I’m still cramping and its still hot as hell. {almost in tears by now} He tells me Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it! {My hero!} He brings her in, sends her to the room for the rest of the evening. And gives me the dog so I can finish taking her out. {One more blank look} At least he kept the movie on Pause til Lucy was done with business. Thanks, Honey.
We didn’t see her for the rest of the night. D kept a low profile for the evening too. She didn’t want any of what her sister had just gotten. But the dog? Um, she’s not too smart. Her ass sat at the front door scratching, whining and crying to go out. Mind you, when I took her out, she took care of all business necessary. So she was just being a PITA because there was something on the ground the kids dropped that she kept wanting to lick. Ugh. Annoyed, Mister JUMPED off the couch and headed to the door towards the dog. I yelled DON’T SPANK HER! He swooped her up and crated her for the evening. A No No in my book, but I was not about to say anything. I didn’t want to end up alone in my room or in a crate for the rest of the evening too!
Finally, at 9:00, Mister went to bed, C was asleep, I let Lucy out for a bit, D was still awake with me and it was now only 89 degrees. I went to bed at 10:20 to catch up on my sleep. Fricken Lucy woke me up at 11:10 to go out. Bitch. Mister was snoring like a fricken bear. It was hot as HELL in our room. I wanted to sleep on the couch at this point. But I must’ve fallen asleep before I remembered to get up and go.
Can you believe I endured this all without the aid of a Miller Lite? I must’ve really been PMS’ing. Tonight? I see a few ML’s in my future.
Good lord! Last night I took Lucy walking with me to the park for the first time. She’s about 4 months old so I thought she could handle it. WRONG. When we went to pick my Mom up, my Dad told her Watch, you guys’ll end up carrying that dog. Guess what? We ended up carrying her. LOL
So we get to the first park, yes the first park, and there is this BIG ASS shaggy, jacked up Ghetto looking stray dog just walking around. He gets a whiff of Lucy & starts following us. We tired to SHOO him away, nothing. I was afraid to toss water on him because I didn’t want him to chase me. I couldn’t put Lucy down because the bastard kept following us. I told my mom Let’s get out of here. I’m afraid he’s going to jump on me to get her.
So we got to another park not too far from that one. We get there, all is going well for the first 2 minutes, then Lucy decides she has to handle business. On the sidewalk. While people are walking around her. I clean up, no biggie. But my dog is weird, she will usually ONLY dump on concrete and not on the grass. Freak.
So we get walking. She’s going from left to right to left to right to left back to the right. I had to shorten her leash to keep her at my side. I think she’ll be needing a harness in the future. After about one lap around the park, she starts to jump up on me TO CARRY HER! I’m so not kidding either. I ignored her for a bit, but then gave in. What kind of doggie mom would I be if I made her walk? Not only am I now carrying her, but she’s got her head on my shoulder crying and whimpering. Damn near broke my heart!
After awhile I set her down, we’re walking along and what do I see? A group of about 4 Cholo dudes walking our way with two of the BIGGEST Pit Bulls I’ve EVER seen. And trust me, living in LA I’ve seen my share of Pit Bulls. One dog had the head the size of a full grown man and then some! His owner was walking him leaning back, holding the chain with two hands sort of digging his heels in the grass. Fook Mi! What did I do? I snatched little Lucy up right quick, turn my back, close my eyes and prayed that the dog didn’t get away from the owner. LMAO It was too intense.
After that, two cute little boys rolled up on scooters and wanted to pet her. When she saw the scooters she hid and barked at them. She remembers being runned over by a scooter 2 weeks ago. Poor thing was traumatized!
After about 2.5 walks around the park we gave in and went home. As soon as we got in the car, she went to sleep.
So, I really see a harness and dog training in her future. I would love for her to be able to walk at my side at all times. She’s usually pretty good about car rides, I hope I didn’t traumatized her any further!
Can’t believe its been almost two weeks since I’ve posted anything. My life must be real boring right now.
Ok, lets see, we just got back from vacation. I had a real short week at work last week (Yay!). We had company over on Saturday night, usually its fun but I was in such a PMS funk it was not funny. I hardly drank & I couldn’t wait for everyone to LEAVE! I just wanted to get in bed with my man. Even if he was asleep already!
We spent yesterday just hanging out. The girls & I went shopping for the party this weekend (my birthday! Yay), then we just chilled. T & I finally got in some quality time last night. I secretly enjoy when no one calls or comes over on Sunday.
Tonight I’m going walking after dinner. Its been a couple of weeks + vacation = Lazy & Fluffy! This time I’m taking Lucy with me for a walk. It’ll be her first time walking with me, so I want to see how well she does and how far she can go without me having to lug her all the way home. Wish us luck! If she proves to be good at walks, then we both might get the exercise we need!
So now I’m off to lunch. I have errands to run before the party, but its so hot outside, I think I’ll save them for Friday afternoon when I take off of work early.
